Harlequinade

 

Taking cream tea with Maggie Medusa.

She tried to catch my eye.

I tried to press her to a scone.

Her hand ran up my thigh.

At least I think it was her hand...

 

 

In a crack den

with Uncle Ben.

He touched me with his wisdom

and something else I'm loathe to mention.

"Oh Ben," I said,

"How'd you get so old

and bald and so very wise?"

He clipped me around the head

and sent me out to the shop

for fags and Scampi Fries.

 

 

I went to the dogs with Frankie Howerd.

We lost a small fortune.

If I hadn't been such a coward

I would have stopped the old buffoon.

Instead I held his gabardine mac

while he chased the electric hare

round and round the track.

We tittered not that night

and he never took me back.

 

B.R. 12/10/2014

 

Frankie Howerd by Caravaggio. Titter ye not.