Salute to Shipley's Public Toiletz

 

  

If these urinals could talk,
then what tales they might tell
of great passion,
of high fashion,
of lost gloves
and love letters,
written within the cubicles.

If a pair of eyes were to stare back
from in amongst the cakes of soap,
checking out Shipley's great and special,
its many random
and uniquely beautiful;
well, I wouldn't be in the least surprised.
All men are equal before the trough.

"I believe that Peter Wyngarde
may have once passed through here
during his Grand Tour of the '70s.
'twas a more innocent time then ..."

"Wasn't it once a centrefold
in Toilets o' the North magazine?"
Memories in Shippers linger
like the heady scent of B.O.
intermingled with Lynx
and broken dreams.

Now, the door has closed for the last time
(though you might want to hold it shut, just to be sure).
Yesterday's attendant
may become tomorrow's curator
of this museum piece,
of this museum of piss ~
a reminder of the halcyon days
when local councils spent
their cash on public facilities.

b.r. 04/05/2015

Carry On at Your Convenience - Sir Sidney James contemplates the closure of Shipley market square toilets