The Assassination of Phil Collins

At the concert of the bald-headed man
he turns smarmily from the ivories
and looks out at the crowd
at a dread sea of respectability
an ocean of white sock black trainer-wearing crustacea
and he feels smugger
than any bugger has the right to feel

but back in Row 56
a man called Hamish McBlain
extracts a crossbow from his briefcase
and carefully takes aim...

then suddenly:

→ → → → → → THWAP!

AAAAAAIIIIIIEEEEEE!!!!!!

That's not on the CD
says a gay chardonnay lady

A bolt from the blue ass Tory giggers
He didn't see that coming
In the Air Tonight

His wounds are appalling
We pray to the gods
If he pulls through this it's
Against All Odds

He doesn't...


~ B.R. 1998, revised 2015