Howard and Hilda

 

 

 

Howard and Hilda stood side by side on Beachy Head in their matching cardigans. Life had been hard of late, hard as Hell, what with Catchword (with Paul Coia) and Van der Valk not being on the television anymore, and Hilda having to go on the game. Howard still wasn't really sure what "the game" was but it seemed to be making Hilda very unhappy and she was away from home rather more than either of them would have liked.

 

The time had come. Howard felt ready to jump. He reached out for Hilda's hand...

 

...then recoiled when he found that he was holding what appeared to be a tentacle. With a whip crack-a-wahey the thing that just moments before had been Howard's loving wife had lassoed him around the waist.

   "Mercy!" Howard ejaculated, choosing an odd moment to quote Roy Orbison. But it was too late, the monster had him firmly by the grollings. Without further Sade Adu, it dragged him down into the ulcerated, Listerineless mouth of Hell.

 

B.R. 16/04/2016