Jubilee Blues

I woke up this morning
With the blues ten different ways.
Couldn't see how I could get
Through the next four sodding days.

Had blues in my orange juice -
They call them "juicy bits".
The BBC Breakfast Blues
It got right on my tits.

I popped my Union Jack bread
Into my Union Jack toaster.
Put my Union Jack mug down
On my Union Jack coaster.

There was no news, just reds, whites and blues,
No time for republican views,
Just Nicholas Witchell (what a twitchell)

Talking about the jubilee:
"Everybody is happy and free!"
Yeah, to celebrate their slavery
Enduring down the centuries.
"Don't you just love The Royals?"
Well, I don't want to be disloyal
But NO!!! I must be that bellend
Who don't want no four day weekend.

Never had no time for fox hunting.
I was born without a silver spoon.
I'll be damned if I'm hanging out bunting
For Hor Majosty The Quoon.*

Sue me! Do me! Shoot bullets through me!
Please release me from royal torture!
Can't you stop the crowds from cheering?
Won't you stop Prince Philip sneering?
I got the red, white and blue blues
To a regicidal level.
The time for change, it must be nearing.

B.R. 04/06/2012

Jordan as Amyl Nitrite in Derek Jarman's "Jubilee" (1978)

* courtesy of Gerald Wiley: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gerald_Wiley#Gerald_Wiley